Old Memories

Easter often brings back unhappy memories. I realize now it is so sad because it is a joyous time in my faith and spring is such a season of hope and newness.
For me it brings back a lot of memories of not being worth much in the eyes of my parents and them being wrapped up in their disapointment in how their lives turned out. Usually my mother really didn’t want to do the little things that told us she loved us. Dad was busy trying to be important around the church. I realize now how sad both of them were.
My mother wonders why none of us ever ran to greet her when she got home. Which is ironic, I remember greeting her and being told to quit hanging on her and leave her alone. I also remember her acting like she prefered every other little girl in the world to me.
The irony is she now criticizes me with my son saying I spoil him. I do not listen. Her sons visit her maybe once a year. The reason I go over so often is for my grandmother.
As an adult I saw the "self-important" behavior in others while volunteer (mostly) and some on the job. It is a sad state for people to be in. My father has changed. He realizes what is important and what lasts. It is good to see that people can change.
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